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October 06, 2021

Why We Chose Homeschooling (and Why You Should Consider It) | S2 E4

Just like your family, The Alessi family had to make decisions about education - and they chose to switch to homeschooling. Here they share how you can make the transition even if you are working full-time, or are concerned about your ability to educate your children.

Just like your family, The Alessi family had to make decisions about education - and they chose to switch to homeschooling. Here they share how you can make the transition even if you are working full-time, or are concerned about your ability to educate your children.

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The Family Business with The Alessis

Every parent wants the best education for their children, but these days, it’s very difficult to decide where that education should take place. The Alessis faced the same decision, and they eventually settled on a solution - homeschooling. 

Steve and Mary Alessi made the switch to homeschooling as they raised their four children and now they are sharing their insights and advice to parents who are considering making the move to homeschooling.

In this episode you’ll learn how to find the time, resources and community support to make this transition even if you are working full-time, or worried about the quality of your child's education.

You’ll see that homeschooling is more than a fringe community or a fad, but instead a rich and beautiful way to lead and guide your children into becoming responsible, well-educated and confident adults.

How Homeschooling Worked for The Alessis

After beginning homeschooling with their three girls -  Stephanie, Lauren and Gabrielle -  the Alessis quickly saw results in greater confidence as well as academic growth.

All three of the Alessi girls went on to graduate from homeschool and were accepted in colleges. Stephanie went on to earn a Bachelor's degree in English Literature. Lauren earned a Bachelor's degree in hospitality, and is currently pursuing a Masters degree in clinical health and mental counseling at Liberty University. Gabrielle is currently working toward a Bachelor's degree in Communications.

Resources for Those Interested in Homeschooling


 
Note: 
Links are for information purposes only and do not constitute endorsement by Metro Life Church or the Alessi family,

Homeschool Legal Defense Association - A national organization dedicated to helping parents exercise their rights to homeschool - https://hslda.org

Homeschool Curriculum Choices - from FPEA (Florida Parent Educator Association):
  https://fpea.com/homeschooling/choosing-curriculum

For more information on Metro Life Church's Homeschool Co-Op, head to http://metrolifechurch.com and contact us! 

 

Join our family business every week as we talk about life, and help you build a great future with your family, no matter what business you are in.

New episodes are uploaded every Wednesday! 

More Resources

Get your copy of the new book by Steve Alessi,  “Forty-Two: A Guide to Finishing Well when You Thought You Were Finished”

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Transcript

0:09  
Hello, it's Steve and Mary Alessi and we want to welcome you to another episode of the family business podcast with the Alessis, because we are talking everything from business and family, especially family, because family is everybody's business. Now our business, Mary, are as pastors.

0:28  
 Yeah. 

0:28  
And we do church work. So what we'd like to do in our podcast, talking to our podience.

0:35  
That is so cute. I had not heard that term.

0:37  
 I know, I know. I made it up. 

0:39  
Did you?

0:40  
 No I stole it from some other podcaster. But in actually the first time I heard I'm like, that's so corny. But I thought man, that would make the... Yeah. Yeah. Podience.

0:52  
Podience?

0:52  
 Podience.

0:53  
 You're the podience. 

0:54  
 Yeah. So what we do here is talk about things we don't always get the chance to talk about on Sunday. And I think this particular subject matter that we're going to discuss today is one of the top priorities that we tried to embrace in our family. 

1:17  
Right? 

1:17  
And so it's going to be good to be able to share this because as where our family has landed today is a direct result. 

1:29  
Yes

1:30  
...Of this particular priority that we have grasp. Now, before we get into it, let me just say this, I think this podcast thing is like a new love, is it, I'm enjoying it, you do a great job at it. Well, besides that, I mean, I really enjoy that.

1:45  
It's a good environment for you, right? 

1:47  
It's fun. 

1:48  
 right.

1:49  
 It's... it's like allowing us to really connect with people more personally, getting in their hearts, getting in their heads. This is really fun.

1:57  
Well, I think too, as a pastor all the years you preached, you had to condense all of this information and revelation and knowledge into 30-35 minutes. 

2:06  
Yeah. 

2:06  
And that's all you got. But you had so much more to say, yeah, and this gives you that opportunity to really share and when experience starts to catch up with that, you've lived a lot of years, then you realize you need a different forum with more time. 

2:21  
Yeah...

2:22  
...to be able to share what you've learned on

2:23  
that platform. There's a disconnect, you can't absolutely disconnect. Yeah, you're talking to so many different experiences and people out there. But when we're doing this, it's like, we're a little more up close and personal. I feel that. It's like I see these faces, and yeah, these families and people and their situation and challenges while we're talking to one another. And as I... gosh, you know, we've said it too, if I could just sit down and talk to so and so,  we can, you know, help bring a little balance to it. And it's that personal aspect of these podcasts that I find very motivating and exciting. So it's a new love.

3:00  
...and the feedback from our audience, our podience, your people that are listening, we're hearing that continually. We feel like we know you guys. 

3:07  
Yeah. 

3:07  
Whereas I don't remember ever hearing that of all the years we've taught from a platform, because there is a disconnect. But this removes that space and that gap. And we really just get to let our hair down and tell them what we think, what we believe.

3:22  
And if this is a blessing to you, then why don't you turn around and tell as many people as you can about it, post about it, comment about it, because we want to try to help them as well, and connect with them, as well. So here's the priority of we've embraced over the years that has helped get us where we are today. And it's education. 

3:44  
Yeah.

3:45  
 All four of our kids have either graduated from college, or are in the middle of their college experience, which is great, because I think there's a big difference for a young person, between them getting a job and having a career. 

4:00  
That's right.

4:01  
...and you can have a job, everybody can get a job. And that's going to give you some money. But a career gives you a little bit more security ...stability as you're able to not only get paid a salary, but then you get benefits, like medical insurance, like even retirement that is set up ,and it's good to have. So education is always important. And even though we knew our kids were going to work with us, we thought no, they need to go ahead and continue their education out of their early classes and get it on to that college scene that's going to help them, help them in the future, even with the precious people that are a part of our church on a regular basis. But let's talk early childhood education. 

4:47  
Yes.

4:47  
 And something that we chose to do. Yep, so here it is. We are homeschool parents. Can you believe it?

4:56  
Yes. And we aren't weirdos. Not all the time. There's a stigma with homeschool parents that most families have if you've never embraced homeschooling, and the stigma is that somehow you're this traveling family, hippie group that only wear skirts and sandals, and you are either Amish or you live out in the middle. Is that my coffee? Oh, I thought you looked at the table. My coffee is coming.

5:20  
Amish,

5:21  
Amish, weird families. And that's not at all what it is. So it's really familiess as we decided a long time ago, that we wanted to make sure we gave our kids. Yes, I'll take that. I need coffee today. We gave our kids...

5:37  
Allen's trying to...

5:39  
Thank you, Alan. He was a homeschooling dad. As a matter of fact, Allen was a huge influence in... in even us raising and doing... making sure that we homeschooled a certain way because he's a brainiac. And he raised two brainiacs, very talented kids raised three, but two he homeschooled, and the talent is off the charts with both Marcus and Naomi. So that was a real influence on me. And... and you in sticking with the homeschooling process. But I want to just quickly talk about the stigma first and foremost.

6:11  
Let's do this, though. Okay, if we're stigmatized, so is Jonathan and Jackie. 

Yeah. 

Because they're homeschool parents,

6:17  
...they became homeschool parents too. And you know, we've got charter schools and their kids got into charter schools, which was a great blessing. That's a big deal. But we then found that they decided homeschooling was an even better option for their children. Now, I like to say this, and I really believe it.  If you can find the perfect small school, for free, that has teachers that are incredible in their spirit, and love education, don't have an axe to grind, that are going to give your children this perfect experience of learning and safety, go to school, if it's great for them,  if the environment's good

6:59  
Even if its a private school. 

7:00  
If you've got the money, fine. But the truth is, the systems of school are changing, teachers are under it. They the pressure that they're under the academic changes, the expectation changes, the pressure, and the stress on our kids to learn has never been what it is today. Yeah. And when our kids graduated a few years ago, it was bad, then it's way worse now.

7:24  
Yeah. Let's give a shout out real quick to all the teachers, all the educators, all the administrators in school systems that do sacrifice. And we've known some that they put in long hours in the classroom...

.... yes....

....but they also bring that home to them to have to prepare for the next day. So big shout out, we respect you. We pray for you. We bless you. We support you, all that is there to help you do what you do.

7:52  
They do it for the love of teaching. 

7:54  
They do. They do. 

7:55  
They don't even get paid that much. 

7:56  
Right. But the whole whole home school experience takes educating, literally takes it home, it brings it closer to home, right to the family. And that's one of the reasons why we did it. 

8:13  
Yeah. 

8:14  
We...listen, we're not the kind of people that are going to get up and complain about how bad things are in the world. And we saw overcrowding in our classrooms, we saw teachers, even in a private Christian school environment, sharing some philosophies and values with our kids that we didn't agree with. They were not the same values that we had. We had some, you know, sit down with certain educators and administrators in the school system. And what we said was this, we're not going to continue to beat a dead horse. We know what the school system offers. This is the best they can do. If we want to make it better - we're not going to complain anymore.

8:57  
 That's right. 

8:58  
We're going to go ahead and take action. 

9:00  
That's right. 

9:00  
So the action we did was we homeschooled our three girls. So Christopher went through the school system.

9:08  
 That's right. 

9:08  
It was wonderful for him. Steph got almost three quarters of the way through and we said okay, now we're making a change for her, then Lauren and Gaby. We then.... you then homeschooled all of them at that point. And with our busy schedule, and everything that went on, we were able to take responsibility for their schooling and their education, and make sure they were being given the same values, which we as leaders and so forth, as Christians, we felt were important to pass on to our kids so we didn't leave it up to someone and even when we had them in that private school, Mary we're paying a lot of money for it. 

9:53  
 Oh my goodness it's so expensive. 

9:54  
And we weren't happy with the... at least that what they were bringing home so we had to take responsibility for it, which was why we homeschooled. Not because we want to be a part of some homeschooling group or anything like that....

10:07  
...or travel and vacation that wasn't us either. We were very busy. 

10:10  
We just knew our kids were smart enough to be put in a situation, learn how to figure out how to learn, because learning is a lifelong process. So we help them do that. And then of course, the material, the... the curriculum, all of that, that lined up with our values we were able to connect with...

10:28  
...That's right....

10:28  
....and then you put them through testing and it was really great to do all of that. Then you helped handle getting them into college with their transcripts, all of that stuff. It's very organized, it's... it's very responsible, the whole environment's are very responsible,  environment, I love that it teaches the kid - maybe this is the biggest thing. Learning wasn't forced on them...

10:53  
No, stress free. 

10:54  
 It really wet their their appetite for wanting to learn. And that's something that today when we see them still self learners - self motivated. 

11:06  
Yeah. 

11:06  
We accredit that to the homeschool environment.

11:09  
Well, it's almost like when they whatever year they start, they actually start learning how college is going to be. Because you do have to be a self learner, you have your, your daily tasks, you know what the agenda of the day is going to be. And a child gets up and they -  you know, the thing about homeschooling, even now post COVID is it's even improved more, because everybody went online for, for a year. So homeschooling was already doing that, where you sat with your laptop, and you could either have a teacher, if you wanted to pay a little more, you could do that. You could have a system and a software program where your mom was the teacher, which is what what I did, I spent the big bucks at -   big bucks at first and then I was like, wait a minute, I can do this for less. And every year that went by, it got easier, the kids quickly learned the system even better than me. They learned how to get into the system and do their daily tasks,  when they would have to either redo a project or wasn't good enough. And it really was not near the burden and pressure on me that I thought it was going to be going in. Now the first year for every homeschool parent is not the easiest. But once you adjust to the homeschooling lifestyle, really what you have to get over -  I think this happens like at the end of year two, you start thinking to yourself, I can't believe that everyone doesn't do this. 

True. You think 

12:34  
It makes the home....

12:36  
 everything changes...

12:36  
...at night, everything that you're doing, the stress levels are so reduced...

12:40  
... oh my gosh

12:41  
 because the kid here's the deal at school, the teachers not fighting with 30 or 40 other students...

12:47  
...and disciplinary problems

12:48  
... and when they're fighting with those kids and their disciplinary and all of that, the kids don't are not really given the full hour or so that's needed to learn a certain subject. Right? So then they're they're coming home with loads of homework. 

13:03  
That's a big one.

13:04  
That's crazy. 

13:06  
There's no homework with homeschooling.

13:08  
So that but before you cut my my point, I was trying to make... you ended way too quick. The stress that comes with all of that. Bringing  home that homework, dealing then with Johnny in the classroom, who called them a name and then the unruly kid who was cussing and the kids are upset that...that stress is all removed. And when the kid, the child comes home, when our kids came home, they were.... first when they were in  school, they were a wreck.

13:39  
 It was terrible. 

13:39  
But now when the day of education is over, whatever that is, three o'clock, four o'clock. It's done.  Now they can be kids and young adults, and enjoy the rest of the life which then took the pressure and the stress away from us when we would come home. 

13:55  
Yeah.

13:56  
As parents, having a job now coming home and having to figure out how are we going to get them through all of these different homeworks and assignments. And we had three girls... 

14:06  
Three girls back to back.

14:07  
 that were in school pretty much bringing all that stuff home. 

14:10  
We did.

14:10  
We eliminated all of that. And it allowed our kids to learn during the hours of education. Yeah. 

They learned then, and then we were able to enjoy family. That's important.

14:23  
It is important and I something that really stood out to me about homeschooling and I've said it over and over again. It's not....it's not all what homeschool gives you. Although it gives you a lot. It gives your family a lot. It gives your kids a lot. It's what it extracts. It's what it eliminates. It eliminates the stress of "what in the world is a teacher made with this assignment?" It eliminates the kids getting in trouble at school because they're in trouble with you. You just deal with that. It also eliminates the drama of other kids in the classroom that they're dealing with, especially with girls but with boys too, but it eliminates all that drama. There is none, you just deal with the home drama. So you're right now you're piled on school drama and home drama, you just eliminate school drama. You don't have to deal with even a lack of understanding because as a parent, one of the things that I loved about having control of the content, if one of the girls did not test on a subject when they.... you know, they study on a unit, and we're going to do this for three weeks, we're going to talk about, you know, World War Two. And when they didn't test well, I would say, All right, we're going to study again, we're gonna take the test again. And it wasn't this expectation of 'to stay up with the whole class'. They stayed up with their learning. And when they finished it and tested well, they knew the information. They weren't just trying to study to cross their fingers and hope they guess good on the test. No, they knew the information. I loved that. I loved knowing that when we were done with a project or a unit or when when they finished on their own, they really knew that information. 

16:00  
Yeah. 

16:01  
And it's still in them. Lots and lots of good knowledge.

16:04  
So what are we doing when we're a busy family, and we can't fit in being home with the kids to do this? What do we do when both parents are full time career? How do they homeschool? 

16:17  
So there's, you can definitely do that at home if you'd like, that's for free. There's so many different curriculums out there that are small, it's I mean, it's so affordable, it's crazy.... to do kids online, and you can do an online program that you pay for. And there's there's a teacher there's... it's endless, what's available to them in the homeschool.... homeschooling arena. Something that I had a vision for, our girls didn't benefit from it, because they were done when we had this vision to do the co-op here. But the co-op that we have at the church here is such an incredible blessing. Again, I wish I had had it back when the girls were younger when they were being homeschooled, but you can come daily. And for a small cost. The kids are in the room with a licensed certified teacher, she has her master's degree. And all the kids at the different ages sit with their laptops, do their schoolwork, if they hit a glitch, or they don't understand a certain problem, they raise their hand, she attends to all of them. She's not a babysitter, she's a teacher that helps them at the point of their... whatever conflict or area they have of need. She steps in and she helps them. But parents are still very involved in their kids' daily work. But the best part of it is, since there is no homework, the pressure on the parent is so far reduced...

Yeah....

... from the average school day.

17:38  
If we can Allen, who's in the booth there now... Maybe you can give us some good resources that we could get available. I don't know if we have show notes or anything like that, that we can make available. So that you can look into all of that, that is out there that will help you... kind of curriculum, the homeschool, the Co Op that we have here, we can put some of that stuff there in the notes that would allow you to check in on what that is to offer. Okay, so some of the obstacles people will bring to us is, you know, I don't have the time for it because I have a career. And I would say to a parent that's in the middle of that right there. There's a lot of that, that makes sense. However, I also want you to think about the value of your kids' self esteem. Their their...

18:35  
 Yeah....

18:35  
.... the balance of their just their whole emotions. What - What does all that mean to you? And if all of that becomes a priority to you, then you're going to figure out a way to get your kids homeschooled. 

18:51  
Right.

18:52  
 You can do that. Right? Okay. And so I would throw it out there for the busy person. Okay. Another thing that some people look at as a roadblock is the community aspect. How will my friend - How will my kids be able to make friends who will be there? They're you know, how do I how do they play sports? The social aspect of it. Take us through that.

19:13  
So I have my... my mentality about that has so changed over the years where I was a little bit more wishy washy in the beginning. And now I'm very concrete and how I feel. Your kids don't learn nearly as much from their friends at school as they do from you. They benefit the most learning from their mom and dad. That is the best influence any kid could ever have. And I think we give away as parents we just kind of naturally give away influence, because we think they need to have these social environments that stimulate learning with how they interact with boys and girls, how they interact with their teacher. Well, the truth is, you you don't have to be in school to learn that. There's all kinds of environments for your child to learn that. There's actually more for them to learn that they have time for now. So for instance, if they're homeschooling, and you're eliminating the six to seven hour school day, that's not all classwork... there's lining up, there's going to the water fountain, there's lining up for school - I mean for lunch in the cafeteria. You know, kids raise their hand, I want to go to the nurse's station, you know, you're eliminating all of that. There's so much more time in your day that you can sign them up for dance, you can sign them up for a music class where there's kids that they are socializing with....

20:35  
 Good....

20:36  
 ....that have the same interest, they do. Voice piano, guitar, all of our kids play instruments and sing, because they had a lot of time to learn. Because of homeschooling, they had time in the afternoon where they weren't stressed and pressured. So also, obviously, the local church. Get your kids in church. The truth is that's some of the best friends they'll find because if you're going to church, and others are at your church, that means you have the same values. 

21:02  
Yeah.

21:02  
Get your kids with those kids.

21:04  
Yeah, we sometimes over inflate, make something of the school and the social aspect of going to a physical school, we overdo that. 

We overdo it. 

We just had 100 and plus kids go through the little camp that we had tons, it was great. tons of fun seeing them all hanging out. Biggest issue they were dealing with this year was loneliness.

21:25  
 No friends. 

21:26  
No friends.

21:26  
They have no friends how you're at a school of 1000 - 2000.

21:29  
Now COVID kept them out of the classroom, no doubt, right, which shows you how fragile those little relationships were. Because the ones you had before COVID are no longer in your world today. So you still don't have those, you don't have those friends, though you once did. That's an issue. The... the, the environment, though, of even some going back and not being able to stay concrete, it just left such loneliness, in  many of these young people. And so the community aspect is important, which is why we're gonna sit here and say, because our business is church and ministry, we're going to say get your kids involved in a good church, and  here in South Florida, this is the place to be because you got good young, with elementary age, junior high, senior high, young adult age, you've got that to help you build the community. And many of the friends that are established here, in this community of church are our lifelong friends with, with some of our people. So that's always important. You know, I think this Mary, we are on about a 15 to 20 year journey with educating our kids. 

22:39  
Yeah. 

22:39  
Okay. 15, while they go through school for a couple of years before they get into grade one, and so on, and then you, you have them coming out of high school, going into a school, college, higher learning even and so on. So you've got about a 15 or 20 year journey ahead of you. And I would say to the parent that is on the front side of the journey now, on the front side, trying to figure out how do I work in homeschooling, I would say to you Just remember that window of learning for you. Will you make the sacrifice now? You're going to see it play out three years down the road, five years down the road. 10 years... 

Yes...

20 years down the road, what you're showing them now, what homeschool gives them,  which I think one of the biggest things that I appreciate about our kids, their confidence today, it came because we got them out of that environment of the local school where there was so much stuff that caused them to come home and be crying because this one didn't look at him or that one said...

23:44  
The social side....

23:45  
The social side was.... it was so combative with them, it was that it hurt them. If they were a little in a chunky phase, and they weren't invited to sit over at the lunch table with the rest of the crew because they weren't as cool or didn't have the ability on the soccer field....  all of that stuff just wrecked our kids self-esteem early on. And what we saw was how quick the homeschool environment changed that.

24:10  
 oh my gosh

24:10  
... confidence our kids walk in today is because we'll take it back to the home school environment. 

24:11  
It was.

24:13  
They knew their stuff, they learned it, then they can go toe to toe with anybody today.

24:25  
And did great in college. 

24:26  
Yeah.

24:26  
They did great. As a matter of fact, they were...I felt like they were as prepared if not more, because they'd already been doing self learning. And this is something else. You spend all this time till they're in 12th grade, and you as a parent has to help them with their homework and figure out what the teacher means. And then what? They graduate and they go to college and they don't need your help anymore? 

24:45  
Yeah.

24:45  
 Okay. Well, it's the same thing with elementary and middle and high school. I understand elementary is more complicated, but that's the easiest years for us as parents, we could do elementary work. We can do it. It's middle school and high school that gets more complicated. But honestly, the truth is, and I believe this with all my heart, I'm very adamant about it. Homeschooling is the best choice for every child. Now that might seem like a really dramatic statement. But I have watched this now for a long, long time. It's not something that everyone can do. And I understand that. I do understand that. So we pray that God opens an opportunity for your child, that's the best for them. If God put homeschooling on your heart, do it. If it's in your heart to do it, do it.

25:30  
We had a lady just recently ...Mom just recently?

25:33  
 Yes. 

25:34  
went to you... kids were in a great school,they got accepted into a great school. But there was that whole homeschool thing. 

25:42  
Yeah. 

25:42  
And what did she do? She turned around ...

25:44  
The day, the first day of school, she went to the principal and said, I've just had a change of heart and took ...it took some work to get the girls in the school. But she said, I've had a change of heart. I want to keep the girls with me. I'm going to homeschool. 

25:55  
Yeah. 

25:55  
And a lot of fear. I've been there. I've walked other young moms through that. I know that trepidation of "I'm not a teacher, I could never do it. I could never do it." Yes, you can. And the thing is, you don't necessarily have to. Their... The curriculum is designed and your kid is smart. But the curriculum is designed to walk them through that helps them learn and their teaching. But you know what the truth is? I used to sit because I had a lot of fear - If you'll remember you were against homeschooling in the beginning. You ... you even told me one time "Don't even say the word homeschool."

26:27  
Why?

26:29  
Stigma. 

26:31  
Schedule. There was no way...

26:32  
... there was no way we could fit in. 

And I thought you have all people would be so overwhelmed by it. 

26:37  
Yeah. 

26:38  
But you showed that you weren't.

26:40  
right. 

26:40  
And the way you can balance it. You handled it because you had that ....you had that passion. You had more vision for this than I did, Mary. 

Yeah. 

26:47  
I didn't want to get caught up in all that I thought it was going to take. But then I saw how seamless the transition coming from that school environment into this environment was, and the way you handled it so well. And I actually, it's kind of interesting, you.... You may not have been, as you know, orderly...

27:12  
 ...organized? It wasn't. It was horrible. 

27:13  
Yeah. We didn't have all the dictionary and all of this stuff laid out for all the kids, they were always scrambling for, looking for things....

27:22  
I had to keep them away from Google. 

27:23  
I didn't see that in you. And that's one of the reasons I'm like, it's not going to work for us. But I was amazed at how confident you started to become and then the pride.

27:34  
 Oh, my gosh. 

27:34  
You were so proud of the fact that you were homeschooling. You were educating your kids not having to worry about somebody else's philosophies coming home and hearing it out of our kids' mouths. You were so confident, and then it became like a no brainer. 

27:52  
there was no going back.

27:54  
 I would just say alongside of this conversation, why it's so important. Well, I believe, and we've seen it the internal development of a kid...

 Yeah. ...

....Is ...is more valuable than the mental development of a kid.

28:13  
 Yeah, character.

28:14  
You have to build their character. 

28:16  
You do.

28:16  
 In the early ages of their character, is being formed. It doesn't come later, you see the results of it later, but who they are in their heart, how they feel about themselves. All of that is being developed early on.

28:35  
Right. 

28:35  
And sometimes we put them environments that they're not ready for, even though there's a certain age there, and they're just not ready for that...the conflict that...that environment causes them internally. 

28:49  
Yes. 

28:49  
So we know a lot of brilliant people, but because of their lack of internal development, they cannot sustain the place where their intellect brings them.

29:05  
  That's right.

29:07  
 They have to depend on alcohol, they have to be on drugs, illicit relationships, They... they're having to develop all of that or depend on all of that, to help sustain where their intellect brings them. Now their intellect is extremely important....

29:22  
.....right.

29:22  
..... and we need the intellect, but we should not allow the intellect to lead us over the internal development of a person's self esteem and integrity and character. We shouldn't allow that to happen. And what I find with homeschooling is there's a tremendous balance.

29:41  
 Absolutely. 

29:42  
You are developing the internal character of the child as well as the intellect. 

29:50  
Right.

29:51  
 And colleges even embrace that.

29:55  
They do. 

29:55  
You know, a kid can be kept out of a college, that their intellect could get them into, if their character doesn't line up with it? 

30:03  
That's right. 

30:04  
 if they've had issues and they go back and look at their social media pages, they can find on their things...images, experiences that their character shows a flaw in? It can keep them from the opportunity that their intellect gets them into. So we're just saying, it was a great experience for us. It's part of our family, it's part of what has fed into the family business that now we lead, because we can't play in our line of work. We got to be people of character, to come alongside of our intellect to now lead others into a spiritual relationship in life. And we can't be conflicted in that. So that really worked for us tremendously. And we would say, hey, if this is something you're interested in, reach out to the office here. And let us let us introduce you to the people that head up our Co Op. And even though you may be in the middle of the season, already of school in the semester,

31:11  
it's never too late. 

31:11  
It's never too late to start.

31:13  
Just jump in. And I and  also listen... I say this all the time. If you try it for a year, and doesn't work for you, put your kids back in school.

Yeah. 

31:22  
Just go back to school, you're not going to lose anything, you're not going to lose any time. There's not one subject that they're going to fall behind on, they'll catch up.  Kids are smart, but I will tell you what else to develop character, knowing that they are doing it on their own. In the beginning, when we started teaching, the girls would sit at the counter. And the first year, remember, they made me cry, because they would say "you're a terrible teacher, you don't know what you're doing. " And I was like, I don't, but we're gonna figure this out together. And it built competence in me, as you noted, but it had also built competence in them, because they were actually learning as they went that they were learning this information, without copying off somebody's paper, and having good peripheral vision that some of us had just to get through school, right? Or they did not need the teacher to understand that. And that it... there, there is endorphins that are released, when a kid is sitting at the counter by themselves.  I don't get it, I don't get it, I don't get it. And there's nobody to answer that. And all of a sudden they go, I get it, because it's there for them to take to slow down. But there's no distractions for them not to really dive in and look and when they get it, and they realize I did that by myself. They move on to the next level with more confidence and more feeling of fulfillment than they ever ever had before. And then if I can do this, then I could do that. Well, let me try my hand at that. That is something quite frankly, that you can't put a price tag on, because it's an internal confidence that is built, because they are self sustaining a little bit. A little bit. 

 Yeah, well let's bring this thing in for close. And I'm going to say this. I think this is important. When it comes to the homeschool environment, you're so close to your kid, you're helping them succeed every day. 

33:06  
That's right. 

33:06  
You're helping them win.  They're not just being judged based on a couple of letters  on a paper that a assignment because the kid didn't have chance to get done. He was so busy your mom and dad didn't give me the attention. And so they didn't get that letter on that assignment. Okay?  homeschooling eliminates some of that pressure. 

33:26  
Right? 

33:26  
Right? So it says to me this, if you really want a strong, secure individual, that you're raising their accomplishments in the classroom, in the homeschool environment, will help them have a healthier self esteem... 

33:44  
 100% 

33:44  
...than the compliments somebody is just going to give them. 

33:47  
That's right. 

33:49  
It's ....it's something when they personally accomplish that goal or that assignment...

.... right...

 without the pressure from the outside when they do it because internally, they're learning to appreciate -  learn -the information and the educate -  they appreciate it. And they're being driven by their internal selves ...

Right. 

.... to learn it? When they do that, and they accomplish it? Man that makes them feel so much more better than a parent coming in at the end of the day and say, Hey, you did good today. 

34:20  
Yeah. 

34:21  
I'm glad you made it through school. Give me that paper on on. Oh, you didn't do it? Well, no. Just a compliment. Just praise. A kid gets better feelings, internal feeling, when they are able to accomplish something. 

34:37  
That's right. On their own. 

34:38  
On their own. And that's what homeschooling helps them do.

34:42  
 It does. 

34:43  
And we hope today's podcast has encouraged you in this, because maybe you are looking to homeschool your kids. Well, take it from us. It works. It's all good. It'll bless them in the future. Alrighty. Have a great one. And thanks for joining us today.

34:58  
Thanks for listening to the Family Business podcast with the Alessis. We appreciate you listening and learning with us as we just shared more about the family business. You know, I bet there's someone you know who can use this kind of advice and encouragement. So make sure to share this episode with them and their family. Because let's face it, family is everyone's business. If you want to be a part of our family, subscribe to the show right now on your favorite app and make sure to download the episode so you can hear them at any time. Oh, and one more thing. One of the best ways to help us spread the word about The Family Business with the Alessis  is by reviewing the show on Apple Podcasts or your favorite app. So help us out. Write a review and join us next time at the Family Business podcast with the Alessis.